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IT’S COMING UP ON SQUEE TIME!!

Since 2012, I’ve had the INCREDIBLE FORTUNE AND LUCK to be a part of SQUEE WEEKEND!!! [which is now a week long event].

It all started with my obsession with fanfic [at the time, Supernatural, and then branching out to Stargate Atlantis, and now Teen wolf and Marvel]. I happened upon a post on Live Journal talking about Squee Weekend – a time when anyone in the SGA [Stargate: Atlantis] fandom, could come and hangout with other fans. I hesitantly asked if anyone was welcome (I knew these people by their user names – reading their work online, but nothing else) and was HEARTWARMINGLY told YES – ALL ARE WELCOME.

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Feeling really nervous, I booked my ticket.

BEST DECISION OF MY LIFE.

I had the BEST times at Squee! I’ve never felt so immediately at home, at peace with a group of people. I want to cry with happiness thinking about it. I’ve been fortunate enough to be able to participate for the last 5 years. (okay, I think it’s 5? it may be 4, but no matter. LUCKY TO PARTICIPATE.]

These people are my people. My tribe. They GET me. And I hope they feel that I get them. Some are writers, some are readers, some are crafters; All are wonderful, genuine human beings. I LOVE squee weekend. Yes, we talk about writing. We talk about fanfic [a lot], we watch sci fi [STARGATE ATLANTIS – our one shared love that brought us all together – but also other things], and we eat and drink. And talk about more things. And go shopping at craft stores. And get overly excited about pens and ink and washi tape.  And sometimes you want a break, so you say to the group “Hey, I need some alone time. I’m going to go shower and nap.” and instead of what normally happens (WHAT? WHAT’s WRONG?? NO STAY, Are you okay??? NO, DON’T LEAVE, IT’S ALL GOOD – so you stay and feel weird and tired), the group says, OKAY SEE YOU WHEN YOU COME BACK, WE MIGHT EAT ALL THE CANDY WHILE YOU’RE GONE. There are no judgements or expectations. You just… leave. and have a shower and a nap. or go shopping by yourself and then have a coffee. and you come back and no one is sad or angry or mad you left. Only happy that they have your company again, but completely respectful of your time away AND I LOVE IT SO MUCH.

I legit get the post-squee blues when I come home. I MOPE. I SIGH. I stare longingly at my computer and think of my online friends and how I’m so so so lucky to know them and how I wish that every weekend was squee weekend.

 

*wipes away tears*

 

BUT NO TIME TO BE SAD RIGHT NOW FOR THE TIME OF SQUEE IS UPON US!!! I’m so ready for it! I’m ready all year long!! SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

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Feeling like a Princess!

Okay, so if you’re here for the fiction, this is not a post for you.

But if you love makeup like me, THIS IS YOUR JAM, Y’ALL.

I recently ordered some lipstick from Holt Renfrew. In my neck of the woods, Holts is like… the highest of the high end. You dream about shopping at Holts. You resent those that do. But it’s because you’re so jelly.

But I decided to TREAT MY SELF
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I ordered three Lips and Boys from Tom Ford and a Charlotte Tilbury. OMG, I felt SO EXTRAVAGANT AND DECADENT.

AND THEN IT ARRIVED.

A BOX WITHIN A BOX. And that second box, hot pink and TIED WITH A RIBBON.  IMG_4508
And then I opened that and there was a little envelope with my receipt and shipping return label – AS IF I WOULD EVER RETURN LIPSTICK.

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AND THEN a little sticker keeping the tissue paper closed.
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INSERT CHOIRS OF ANGELS SINGING (okay, there is one lipstick missing from this pic and that’s because I HAD TO PULL IT OUT TO WEAR IT IMMEDIATELY. it smelled like vanilla bubblegum and I LOVE IT SO MUCH *sobs into her hanky)IMG_4512

LOOK AT THE PACKAGING (Yes, I’m totes abusing caps lock at this point, BUT THIS IS ALL CAPS LOCK WORTHY)IMG_4513

OMG, I ALMOST DON’T EVEN WANT TO USE IT, IT’S SO PRETTY *almost*
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This, hands down, MADE MY DAY, MY WEEK, perhaps even my month. SO PRETTY. so much fun unwrapping! So lovely to hold, and smell and wear! I haven’t worn the TIlbury yet but the TF is a DREAM. The Lips and Boys collection is smaller than normal size, which makes me a little sad, but VANILLA BUBBLEGUM SMELL. OMG. I CAN’T.

Spending time with your Tribe

Ah! Squee weekend! That time of year I get together with my fandom friends [many of whom write, create art, do crafty things and/or are voracious readers].

And then we talk. We talk about a lot. The thing is, there are things that you need to talk about with your female friends – things you can’t find on the internet, or if you do, you don’t feel as comfortable discussing. I don’t mean naughty or salacious conversations [although we have those too!] but things that are important to us. Not only do we discuss, we problem solve. I love this group of people. We are committed to helping each other out. We’ve discussed feeling overextended at work, feeling overwhelmed by life, not knowing where this particular story is going, not knowing if this idea we have is better as a short story or a novel. We’ve also talked about dying our hair and finding a good mascara and bemoaning finding a good bra that fits correctly (this actually ended with a bra-buying trip to a department store).

It just makes me feel like I belong and that I’m safe with my friends. I know I can bring up a topic, ANY TOPIC, and it will be treated with reverence and seriousness. We’ll discuss, we’ll solve the issue or come up with some things to try and I’ll feel better. And then someone will utter a double entendre and we’ll laugh pass around more wine.

I just love spending time with my tribe!

The Importance of Being Miss Piggy

Miss Piggy is my hero.

I feel like I need more of her in my life. Here’s a role model who knows what she wants, isn’t afraid to go get it, and won’t let anyone stand in her way. and she does it all by looking fabulous. Look at her!

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She’s always well-dressed – looking her finest, BECAUSE SHE DESERVES NO LESS

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She doesn’t take crap from ANYONE. she KARATE CHOPS those that dare to fight her.

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She’s not afraid to try new looks or wear different things.

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I feel like, as a woman, I should try to be more like Miss Piggy. She just… gets shit done. My only complaint is that she pined for Kermit for so long. DUDE CLEARLY HAD COMMITMENT ISSUES, PIGGY. If he wasn’t ready to own up to how fabulous you are/were, you should have dropped his green little ass and moved on.

Sure, they got married in the end, but she put up with a lot of shit from him. He was kind of wishy washy for a long time about her.

But other than that, Miss Piggy is totally my hero and I want to be more like her.

The F Word – Fanfiction

Ah yes, the ‘other’ F-word – FANFICTION.

Yes, I write fanfic. No, I won’t tell you my fandom name 😉 [Although I knew a person on fandom that could figure out who people were based on their word usage and writing style – truly an amazing talent!]

I’ve been debating this long and hard over the last couple of days and I really struggled with what to say/do about my fanfic. I’m really  proud of the stories I’ve written – some more than others but I think that’s pretty routine for most authors. Fanfic got me interested in writing again at a time where I had just… lost the joy of it. I started dreading writing and that had NEVER happened to me before. And fanfic really helped me get over that.

I started writing fanfic when I was in highschool, but I didn’t know that’s what it was at the time. it wasn’t until 2009 when I joined LiveJournal that I realized what I’d been doing and that I had this…. epiphany that THERE WERE OTHER PEOPLE OUT THERE THAT LIKED TO DO THE SAME THING.

I’ve had SUCH fun writing fanfic! It’s like playing with someone else’s dressup box. I’m WELL AWARE that there are authors out there that turn their nose down on it or disparage it but I’ve got to be honest – some of the BEST writing I’ve EVER READ has been fanfic. There’s so much HEART in so many of the stories. People really do write for the love of the characters, for the love of the story and even when that writing is rough or raw, it can be gorgeous simply because of the emotion behind it.

My own fanfic taught me a lot about characterization, pacing and what people responded to. I was surprised at times when a story I considered to be ho-hum would be noted as a favorite by readers. Similarly, I was equally surprised when I story I LOVED and thought was some of my best work was received with lackluster response.

At any rate, it made me THINK a lot about my writing. It gave me the chance to experiment. Also, reading some of the works out there really helped me LEARN.

And! Let me just put this out there – if anyone ever reads my Covencraft series and is inspired to write fanfic on it:

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I may eventually release my fandom name but for now, you’ll have to see if you can find me! I’m still out there and I’m still writing.

Jane Eyre

To be frank, I can’t articulate many absolute favorites. If you ask me for my favorite movie, or song or ice cream flavor, I’m HARD PRESSED to name just one. I can give you a list of favorites NOW or favorites THEN or “This is my favorite eye shadow for 4 am because it makes me look NOT DEAD but this is my favorite for going out at night because it has sparkles.”

The exception to my rule is Favorite Book = Jane Eyre.

It’s been my favorite since I read it. I don’t even remember when that was, to tell you the truth. Sometime in University I think. it’s got EVERYTHING:

Romance! Mystery! Spooky happenings! Strong heroine! Snappy dialogue! Brooding atmosphere! Creepy Castle!

Did I mention the strong heroine? Jane Eyre is probably one of the strongest heroines, if not THE strongest heroine I’ve ever read. And she was written in 1847.

If you’ve never read Jane Eyre, here are some quotes from our dear heroine, Jane, to motivate you to pick it up:

  • “I am no bird; and no net ensnares me: I am a free human being with an independent will.”
  • I care for myself. The more solitary, the more friendless, the more unsustained I am, the more I will respect myself.”
  • “I am not an angel,’ I asserted; ‘and I will not be one till I die: I will be myself. Mr. Rochester, you must neither expect nor exact anything celestial of me – for you will not get it, any more than I shall get it of you: which I do not at all anticipate.”

And from Mr. Edward Fairfax Rochester

  • “You have saved my life: I have a pleasure in owing you so immense a debt. I cannot say more. Nothing else that has being would have been tolerable to me in the character of creditor for such an obligation: but you; it is different ;- I feel your benefits no burden, Jane.”

And the quote that has FOREVER RUINED ME:

  • “Because,” he said, “I sometimes have a queer feeling with regard to you — especially when you are near to me, as now: it is as if I had a string somewhere under my left ribs, tightly and inextricably knotted to a similar string situated in the corresponding quarter of your little frame. And if that boisterous Channel, and two hundred miles or so of land, come broad between us, I am afraid that cord of communion will be snapped; and then I’ve a nervous notion I should take to bleeding inwardly.”

He. Should take. To bleeding. Inwardly.

RUINED ME, I SAY!

This truly is my desert island book, my “You can only save one book and must leave the rest” book, my “I’m feeling low and sick and need something to curl up with” book.

I think I need to clear my weekend to read this again.