Hitting the Wall

Yup. I’ve hit the wall. Maybe not THE wall, but A wall. Definitely some kind of wall-ish object. I’m tired before I even get to bootcamp, and when I get there, I’m even more so. I push myself, but my heart just isn’t in it. At least not these past couple of weeks. and when you’re heart’s not in it, it’s tough to get up those stairs/hills/park benches. Last Friday was the first time I really felt it. We were doing hills. We go up, we go down. The idea is you “rest” while you are running downhill. but you are still running. and on my fourth time up the hill, Michelle, my trainer, was chasing me, telling me to keep going, go harder, faster, more! and suddenly, I just stopped.


Plain old stopped. She said I could catch my breath and as I stood there gasping I said, “What I really want is to cry. I’m TIRED.”

She nodded sympathetically. Said maybe that’s what I needed. But I still had to run up that hill. And I did. three more times.

Yesterday, it was full body workout. Up and over the park benches, tricep dips, pushups, run, sprint, jump, burpees. And all I could think was, “Stop. Just stop.” But I kept going.
Today, was stairs. and as I run, I’m getting out of breath faster and it takes longer to get it back. Four times up and down the stairs, then twice running out to the ridge and back. And then up and down again. I go up, I go down.

Three months of bootcamp has caught up to my psyche. I never thought of myself as an athlete. I started feeling like an athlete, but now I’m having second thoughts. Intellectually, I know I’m in a lot better shape. Prolly more so than I have ever been. Yet the scale has not budged. And that weighs on me. No pun intended.

I tell myself, that if I can just push through 4 more bootcamps, I get a whole week off until the next session. Four more bootcamps. Four more hours. It doesn’t sound so bad when you say it like that, but when you’re on the third of four sets of stairs, and you’re gasping for air, or sucking wind as we call it….. sigh.

4 more!


4 comments on “

  1. Heidi Schempp Fournier

    Ok, at this point I think it is safe to say, this has run it’s course and you need to find something else. Also, are taking any vitamin D? With the days getting shorter you should be taking 3 Vitamin D 1000 every morning to help with sleep and counter act the effects of shorter daylight hours. When I hear you want to cry that makes me worry, so get this done and find something new.

  2. Ashleigh

    i wish we lived in the same city! we could do some new crazy fitness thing together every three months so nothing got stale. i really do think it’s a law of diminishing returns thing. exercise is at its most fun (and most effective) when you’re challenging yourself a lot and seeing a big return for your efforts. once your body gets used to doing certain things, the return on the effort gets smaller and smaller. you work as hard, or harder, than ever, but instead of being able to do 20 more squats at your next fitness test, you only do 3 more squats, etc. any ideas for other crazy fitness things to try? i know you said the 10k… anything else?

  3. Jenge

    I think that you need a week off to relax. You have been working out 4 times and up a week for over 3 months. Think about how far you have come in that time. After having a small break from bootcamp I went back and felt energized and ready to take it on again and push myself. That’s the only way you’ll see results! Sorry ladies but I still think bootcamp is the way to go. I have done everything under the sun, even my own personal trainer, and nothing has motivated and kept me motivated like this. Now I must go take an epsom salt bath for my aching muscles.

  4. Jessina

    You can dooooooo it!!! I see you every day *sigh* 🙂 and girl I’m going to put it bluntly – as you know I always do. Your ass is looking pretty hott! The results are forsure showing.

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